Change

I am so afraid of change, it is sad. I am not afraid of changing my hair (cut it today), Changing the color of my walls (did that Sunday) but I am afraid of letting God change my heart. He has always been doing that but I made Him slow down for a while. I was afraid that I would be too different maybe. Why was I afraid? Why did I take the reigns from Him for so long? I was still living my life for Him, but not radically and not running the huge race with Him at full speed. I was taking my hand out of His because I was afraid I would be alone. Stupid I know. My life is nothing without God changing me so radically that I don’t recognize myself. I don’t remember my life BC (before massive change in Christ) 6 years ago. I have been letting myself idle though like a house that hasn’t been cleaned in years. I have cobwebs and dirt that I haven’t let God take away. I have been letting rocks come through my windows and I didn’t ask God to patch up the holes. I can’t live like that way anymore. To be set apart, I have to be Holy and different. I might be alone on the earth, but I am putting my hand back in God’s hands. Isn’t it amazing that God is fighting battles for me against satan right now in heaven? Isn’t it amazing that one day I will be telling God everything that I love about Him face to face?