Expectations

I was talking with a good friend of mine this week about relationships and how we felt when she brought up that it was hard to find someone here (in Utah). She said that she didn’t want to deal with the drama and problems when there was a potential relationship. But problems in relationships happen even among friends. It is just something you have to work through if you want that friendship bad enough. Then we started talking about expectations and whether we should have them.

The world has told us that we have our expectations for guys too high. How can they be too high when they are the same expectations all Christian women through time have had? I believe Christ has given us that expectation and it is for a reason. Christ is our ultimate boyfriend or girlfriend, but he also made us to have a relationship here on earth. He would not want us to think we have to settle because he doesn’t want us to. We cannot fully trust God and expect less than he has told us we deserve. He has told us that it is hard to be married to someone who is not equally yoked. This also means we can’t be looking for someone that is striving toward far more in order for that person to get us there. I think most women are seeking qualities they are striving for.

Are the qualities you are looking for in a relationship partner something able to be attained? Is it something that someone can ask God to make them that way? If they are attainable, then you are really looking for someone who is asking God to help them reach those goals and help you work on them at the same time too. As Rick Warren suggests, God has made you so who better to ask than the person who knows how he wants you?

It is kind of like this: you are looking for someone who does a quiet time daily - they may not now, but between the two of you, you can keep each other accountable and meet that goal.

I know many, many guys who will all tell you to never ever settle . If you don’t’ know any guys or girls that can tell you that, you are looking for guys in the wrong place. God has someone who will meet your needs. Make sure that you are not letting Satan take the perfect man for you out of your life
It is Satan that says we can't, not God, it is Him who makes things possible.
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God is the one who will help you and that guy or girl that is perfect for you reach for the characteristics you want

You will find the guy that is looking to change those characteristics. If there is the desire for change for God's glory, then God will change you. It is the same for the person God has waiting for you. When you find the one, You will see him the way God sees him, as perfect in that way. You will not be deceived, but will see the fruit of his seeking God in those areas until it is perfected.
Remember the Proverbs 31 woman? We have to support and love people to greatness. The person you find will already have died to self and will be on the road to perfection
The person will be the container of all the things you and God have gone over, and you will find that person. It will be part of your love for each other that will bring about change in you and your partner.

Do not settle - God loves you too much for that. If you settle, you are going to forget the kingdom & promises God has for you, which is perfect. Settling, makes you bitter towards God.